Loving someone who does not love you back.

This is probably one of the most painful feeling anyone can experience.Yes unrequited love is one of the worst experiences one can have and one of the ones that gets the least sympathy from your fellows. Falling in love is akin to an addiction.. being in unrequited love ( either from a distance, or after being rejected) is like being in a permanent state of withdrawal - you never heal while there is any contact at all with the person, you just have to get away from them completely and then let time take its course. I cannot even create the exact words on how to make someone feel better when there love is not reciprocated. It hurts, I know.. I know because I experienced it but that did not stop from enjoying life.



 Loving someone who does not love you is the best example of loving unconditionally. You just love without expecting in return. This happens usually when you fall in love with someone very close to you. That person may be your childhood friend, your seatmate during your Chemistry subject, your colleague, or your best friend. When that happens, at first you try to deny it but clearly you cannot because that's just how you feel. That person that was just a "friend" became someone you love dearly and the worst? You can't simply get away with it. Everyday you don't tell that person how you feel the more the feeling becomes stronger. I had my own fair share of falling in love with a friend but I was able to get away with it when I started being unselfish. Why would I give up our friendship for the sake of my feelings? and hello?! I wouldn't even try to tell him first about how I feel. It's a no-no. Ha-Ha! but I know exactly how you feel. That moment when you start looking that person in a different way. That person that was just a "friend" became someone you cared about and loved. Ohh. that feeling when being with him was the only place you wanted :) as the song says "Love is just a beautiful thing" but sometimes it does not end up the way you wanted. You must wake up and understand that we cannot always get what we want. It may be painful at first but would it be more painful seeing them getting bothered because of your feelings? It was a kind act when you gave love unconditionally but sometimes we also have to love ourselves to be able to enjoy the true essence of loving. If you truly love yourself, you'll set yourself free. But if you can't let go, if you're torturing yourself like I have been, you can't loosen those shackles that keep you in bondage. You have to love yourself enough to get away; because what binds you to that memory is not love, but fear. Fear of loss, fear of becoming vulnerable again, fear of failure, fear of watching your heart die and your dreams waste away. 
The only thing that can best fear is courage; and all it requires is a mustard seed of strength and the audacity to water it. Love blooms when you're courageous enough to cast fear aside, when your vulnerable but brave enough to say, my love for myself is so strong, that though exposed, I can love you without fear of losing myself no matter what; because my love does not entitle me to own you. It is a gift I merely give you; and THAT joy is my joy. If your partner leaves, it does not nullify your gift. Love was given, and though it cannot be returned, that love will become a part of the person you bestowed it on. Remember that. Love is not a person. It is a feeling and it wears many faces. It may shift, and it may change, but it doesn't die. It becomes new again in the heart of the person touched by it; and it will touch another on your beloved's journey; and one day; all things being cyclical, it will find you again. It will happen when you draw it to yourself with the love you project; Because love cannot resist love that courageously gives of itself; and wrapping itself in the arms of that old friend that it once knew so long ago, it will finally say 'I'm home'.

My heart goes out to the people here who have just ended relationships. I know much it hurts. I'm on the other side of that kind of pain from a similar loss, and want to say that it will get better, I promise! I never imagined that I would ever be happy again after that difficult relationship and breakup, but I've never been more consistently happy, balanced, and joyful than I am now. Even with the pain of it all, I don't regret my last relationship. I know myself better now then I ever have, especially my dark side. Now, starting a relationship with this new man whom I met when I was perfectly happy to be single, I find myself opening more slowly, but also being able to be more honest because I know how damaging ambivalence, ambiguity, and misconceptions can be. I'm absolutely aware now that this could be over tomorrow, or in an hour. It's a poignant feeling, but not really that unpleasant. It makes me truly enjoy every moment that we are together, and reminds me to keep the rest of my life just as vibrant and exciting, so that I'm not expecting this new person to fulfill everything for me.