***
Dear Person I wish I could write to,
I miss you more then anything in this world. Everything seems so empty with out you around. I absolutely love the little bit of time you do give me every now and then even if you can’t let yourself be alone with me. Every day for me when I’m not with you feels like I’m drowning. I can feel my hands waving violently above the water, splashing and smacking the water, but my head is still submerged. The moment I see your face its like someone reaches down and pulls my head up out of the watery darkness and fills my lungs with fresh air, and then when you leave they shove my head back under all over again. I want so badly to hold you in my arms again, to feel your touch and embrace. I don’t understand what it is you want from me? Why are you making things this way? Do you still love me? If you still love me, why don’t you want to be with me? I can give you anything you want if you came back to me. This doesn’t have to be a committed relationship but I really need you right now and it kills me watching things end this way. I will always love you and want to be with you no matter what happens. You were always the stronger one; I’m just a weak person trying to attach myself to you at this point. Help me be strong again breathe into me and give me life and purpose again. With out you everything loses its purpose and I am just going through the motions like a zombie. I am trying so hard to move on but I can’t. You are the one thing that I will never be able to overcome.
Sincerely,
The person I think you are trying to forget.
***
***
Dear Parents,
Trying, or wanting to be independent from you, doesn’t mean -
.. that we already wanted EVERYTHING to be done in our own way;
.. or that we’re running away from you;
.. or that we’re rebelling;
.. or that we love you less.
A little guidance, trust and encouragement is what we need.
Release your hold a bit, and we’ll make you proud.
Still yours,
Daughters & Son
.. that we already wanted EVERYTHING to be done in our own way;
.. or that we’re running away from you;
.. or that we’re rebelling;
.. or that we love you less.
A little guidance, trust and encouragement is what we need.
Release your hold a bit, and we’ll make you proud.
Still yours,
Daughters & Son
***
***
THIS ONE IS SWEET :)
Dear girl,
Do you remember how it was 5 years ago when you left? I was a pain in the ass, wasn’t I? Always wanting to know about you, never really leaving you alone, even when you asked me to. Always asking about you and bugging you.
So, we’re back to square one, I guess: me wanting everything with you, you wanting me away. 2007 all over again. Only this time, I’d like to get stuck in the middle of 2008. In that brief time window right after you realized/said how much you wanted me, and before my broken-heartedness became stupidity and got the best of me. An honest, sincere, non malicious stupidity. Understandable, even, but stupidity nonetheless.
That brief time window when our timing clicked perfectly. Just like the way our hands did every time they joined. Every. Single. Time.
I am sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you. Sorry I’ve been so stupid. Sorry because I have been selfish and proud. Sorry that I forgot what I meant for you, and what you meant to me. Sorry I overlooked everything because I was so focused on the distance. I am sorry I didn’t really hear. Sorry for being immature. Sorry for everything that I did that made you less happy than what you deserve to be.
And since I’m being honest, I love you and I need you. That’s it. All your flaws, mistakes, cheeks, smiles, bad jokes… even your stubbornness. Everything. I just want you. And I know you believe me (even just very little), or at least see scattered signs of truth in what I speak. You said it to me during our last Skype call. And that was liberating. That whole call was liberating in a lot of ways.
And I want to be with you, be your boyfriend, even if I’m in Isla Grande de Tierra del Fuego, and you’re in Ellesmere Island—look them up—. I don’t care. I’ve learned that while distance is important, there are things far, far more consequential, like finding somebody I want to spend the rest of my life with and holding onto her forever. Holding onto you forever.
I want to grow old with you, wake up next to you, fight for you, take care of you, protect you, hold you in the air when you succeed, and on the ground when you need it. Help you reach your goals, share mine with you, combine them and make them our own. Have you try to wake me up for 30 minutes so we can go and get breakfast, only to get there too late because I overslept. I want all that. Forever.
You know, a couple of years ago, I needed a picture of me, with a very specific angle. I looked in my profile pictures folder and thought that old picture of us together could work, so I took it and cropped it.
I never used it; I couldn’t. When I saw it, something wasn’t right. It just didn’t work, because it HAS to have both of us. It’s nowhere near as good if it doesn’t. Exactly like life, it has to have both of us together. It’s nowhere near as good if it does not.
Because we know life can work with us going our separate ways, never knowing about each other until a friend mentions that, by the way did, you hear, the other one is getting married. Just one more little pinch to the heart.
It could work when one of us accidentally stumbles upon one of our emails (which Gmail works very hard to keep), reads a couple of sentences and closes it, before the pinch evolves into full fledged nostalgia. Life could still work.
Or when I see you in the credits of some TV show, or you see my name in the context of whatever it is I end up doing, and reminisce, even for just 5 seconds, having yet another little pinch to the heart. It would go on.
Or maybe I’m getting too arrogant. Perhaps (and most likely you feel like this right now) your heart wouldn’t feel a pinch. Perhaps you could know about my wedding, find my email, see my name somewhere and not feel a thing. You’d brush it off swiftly, and get on with your day.
But then, life wouldn’t be IT. It couldn’t. And I know that deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, very deep inside, you know that too.
Because we were made for one another. You know that. We just fit. You know that. Just like—once again—our hands fit together. Just like I know exactly how much pressure I should put in your cheeks when I grab them, or when I hug you. It’s so perfect it’s scary, you’ve said before. You know that. I know that.
And I also know you’ve said you know how I feel, what I’m going through, and that you understand. Well, it’s different. It’s different because I’ve been there myself. And we made it out of it. I’m sure you can remember.
I’m gonna ride the arrogance wave up until the end of this paragraph right here, and tell you that despite everything that we’ve done, your bad choices, my piss poor decisions, despite the fact that I broke your heart several times and you did truly break mine more than once, I know we CAN be happy together. That I can make you happy. I wouldn’t try anything if I didn’t KNOW that without a doubt.
I’m not saying it’s gonna be easy. But one or two handsome kids—or furballs—with both of our last names, would be worth it a million times over, without one single shed of doubt. Things like that are worth more than anything. YOU are worth more than anything.
I love you. I really do.
- Guy
***
Dear Doesn't Understand,
All of these things mean you’re human.
They mean you’re not perfect, but neither am I. Neither is anyone else.
It means you’re listening to lies that say you’re not good enough.
Lies that say you’re not worth anything, that no one could ever like you, that you can’t do anything right.
I’ve heard all those lies before.
And they’re exactly that — LIES.
When you see someone you know, acknowledge them. Even if you’re afraid.
When you want to give someone a hug, hug them. Especially if you need a hug.
When you’re with a friend, tell them what’s on your mind. Chances are they want to know.
When you don’t trust yourself enough to love, take the chance. You might get hurt, but it’s almost always worth the risk. Because loving someone, even just platonically, will always make life a little brighter.
When you compare yourself to someone else, stop. And remember that you’re not them, so you don’t have to be anything like them. Being yourself is so much more freeing than trying to be someone else.
When you’re jealous of your best friend but you know you should be happy for them, focus on being happy for them. Remember that good things happen to everyone in their own time.
When you don’t want to go out, don’t worry about it! Invite a friend over and stay in, watch a movie, eat pizza, have fun.
When you think people won’t miss you, remember that we impact people far beyond what we realize and chances are someone, somewhere, does miss you.
When you think no one could possibly understand you, remember that your troubles aren’t unique. Someone does understand. Sometimes it’s just harder than you want it to be to find that person.
You’re you. Embrace that.
And enjoy life.
Love,
Someone who understands
They mean you’re not perfect, but neither am I. Neither is anyone else.
It means you’re listening to lies that say you’re not good enough.
Lies that say you’re not worth anything, that no one could ever like you, that you can’t do anything right.
I’ve heard all those lies before.
And they’re exactly that — LIES.
When you see someone you know, acknowledge them. Even if you’re afraid.
When you want to give someone a hug, hug them. Especially if you need a hug.
When you’re with a friend, tell them what’s on your mind. Chances are they want to know.
When you don’t trust yourself enough to love, take the chance. You might get hurt, but it’s almost always worth the risk. Because loving someone, even just platonically, will always make life a little brighter.
When you compare yourself to someone else, stop. And remember that you’re not them, so you don’t have to be anything like them. Being yourself is so much more freeing than trying to be someone else.
When you’re jealous of your best friend but you know you should be happy for them, focus on being happy for them. Remember that good things happen to everyone in their own time.
When you don’t want to go out, don’t worry about it! Invite a friend over and stay in, watch a movie, eat pizza, have fun.
When you think people won’t miss you, remember that we impact people far beyond what we realize and chances are someone, somewhere, does miss you.
When you think no one could possibly understand you, remember that your troubles aren’t unique. Someone does understand. Sometimes it’s just harder than you want it to be to find that person.
You’re you. Embrace that.
And enjoy life.
Love,
Someone who understands
***
and the SWEETEST ;)
Dear Future Wife:
Hi.
I haven’t met you yet, but I’m sure you’re the most beautiful woman that God has ever created. We were made for each other, y’know. I think that’s how it works, anyway.
I haven’t met you yet, but I’m sure you’re the most beautiful woman that God has ever created. We were made for each other, y’know. I think that’s how it works, anyway.
I just wanted to get a few things straight before we find each other. Just clear the air, if you will. Our life together is going to be great, let me assure you. It won’t always be easy, but I love you and love me. We love the Lord, and he won’t give up on us. We’re going to live in the best house I can afford to buy for us. I haven’t really decided on a fence yet, because those are kind of tricky to mow around. Input is welcomed on that, as it always will be. I’ll love you unconditionally; if for nothing else because you picked a short awkward boy to spend the rest of your life with. I’ll wear a tie sometimes for no other reason but just to look somewhat presentable standing next to the most astounding beauty this world has ever seen. You’ll wear a white summer dress on warm days, and we’ll relax in the back yard with made-from-the-container lemonade, making sure our kids don’t kill each other (P.S. can I please please please name our boy Oliver?) We’ll send the kids to school and then head to our respective jobs (if that’s what you want. You can stay home too, that’s entirely up to you) We’ll put bows in our daughter’s hair and she’ll forever be daddy’s little girl. She’s gonna get older, and I’m going to have problems with that. I’m going to have to pray every day for the Lord to give me strength not to hurt any boys that she might bring over. Our boy will take after his father, and he’ll be a big nerd at heart. Hope that’s cool with you. I’ll play music and you’ll sing; and it will be beautiful. We’ll have my friends and your friends over for dinner and we’ll laugh at each other endlessly. We’ll hold hands when we’re old, and walk around the park to get some exercise in. I’ll always reply “Absolutely not, you are the most beautiful woman I know” to the “Do I look fat in this?” question. We’ll read the bible to each other and our children, building our life entirely on Christ. We’ll love and appreciate art. We’ll be cultured. We’ll travel when we can. And I will always, always, always love you.
Love,
Your Future husband.
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